i'm sorry how much??

hello from the world capital of neutral politics.

so munich is over and i'm in geneva, but i'll start with the rest of munich.

the hostel i stayed at was called euroyouth hostel, and it was awesome. it was the perfect vibe, loads of cool tourists in the bar and still a small, quiet, clean dorm. after i wrote the last post, i went back to the bar and had two happy hour cocktails, because happy hour in germany lasts from 6-9 (awesome!!) and met up with the americans from the night before, max and a sober and very embarrassed drew who apparently didnt love me anymore, funny how that happens. they introduced me to their other friends from seattle and some boys from hawaii and we played beer pong in their dorm, which is an awesome drinking game which i will teach you when i get home because its amazing. you have to drink beer the american way, out of cups, but its totally worth it. the boys really wanted to go to a beer garden because it was someones birthday, but they were all wearing awful clothes and thongs and i said they probably wouldn't get in, which was when they christened me 'mom'. fair enough, there were about 8 boys and i was the only girl, so i went with it. i called them my little chickens.

we went to augustiner brewery which was about 10 minutes from our hostel and ordered steins, which are litre glasses of beer. a beer wench (the technical term, therefore not sexist) could carry all 9 steins at once! it was awesome. one of the hawaiian chickens who introduced himself as 'smooth' (vomit) found some german ladies and there was a quick conference between the boys as to which one was the sexiest and who would get to try with who. of course, the german girls were terrified of a large group of drunk american boys, and fled as soon as they could. the other hawaiian, named something i'll remember later, told me about how he'd done a tour of iraq, but i was drunk and i cant remember any details.

the next day i got up in time for the walking tour, so andy (of previous post laundry buddy fame) and i got to see the sights of munich. we did a free tour, which is a farce because they bully you into tipping, with a guy called keith, a scottish guy living in germany. he showed us a really lame cuckoo clock (europe is really keen on those!) and some of the places where hitler made speeches etc. at one point he was talking about how its now illegal to make the hitler salute, this exchange occurred:

dumb american girl in east coast drawl: so is that a federal law, or is it municipal?
keith: federal? i dont know what you mean?
dagiecd: fe-der-al. for the whole country, ya know, fe-duh-ruhhhl
k: ............... (stares)
diplomatic and helpful jes: well, germany isnt a federation, so they dont call it federal. maybe you mean, is it a national law.
dagiecd: .................. (long pause as stares at jes).............. FE-DUH-RUHL.
dahj: ...ok.
keith: its for all of germany.
dagiecd: .............(rolls eyes)

americans are funny.

after the tour i walked very slowly down the expensive strip of shops and wandered in and out of gucci, louis vuitton, dolce and gabbana. they were pretty un-keen on my dunlop volleys, but i persevered.

that night i went for drinks at the famous hofbrauhaus with some canadians i met, brittany and rachel, and their friends whose names i have also forgotten, one of whom was from montreal and sees win butler around the streets. we had more steins and ENORMOUS pretzls, bigger than your head, and stumbled home at a reasonably civilised hour.

saturday was my last day in munich, so i took my book (sex and the city) and i walked to the englischer gardens. they were very beautiful, theres a big river which runs through the middle, and it has all these little rapids and waterfalls and people somehow manage to surf which is pretty cool. i sat down by the river and ate my power sandwich, and read sex and the city for about half an hour.

THEN THERE WAS A DISASTER.

is anyone still reading? that was for your benefit. all of a sudden, in the middle of my peaceful picnic, disaster struck. suddenly my left thigh was burning like fire!! i looked all around for something that could have bitten me, like a spider or a lion or something, but nothing was there. i had three distinct bites. i was about to go into end of life panic attack spiral where i imagine all the things i havent achieved, when mum called. and she said nah she'll be right, so i had a beer and was fine. crisis averted!!!

i finished sex and the city and went back to my hostel where i met two american girls (from georgia! the south!) from my dorm, and andy the laundry friend, and we went back to the hofbrauhaus, this time for dinner. i had to hold the table while they all did stuff, and i got accosted by a very VERY drunk german man, of about 55 years old who kept trying to kiss me, much to his very VERY drunk wife's chagrin. i gave up the table and ran downstairs and found the others and we got a new table. SECOND CRISIS AVERTED.

i ate some kind of cheese pasta which was pretty lame but i got a stein which was awesome.

the georgia girls, whose names are gabi and ilena really wanted to find a club, so we spent about 1o hours and used all our german skills trying to find a club called two rooms, but in the end went back to our hostel for cocktails and karaoke. i did not get involved, but there was a very rousing rendition of 'i believe in a thing called love' from smooth, and a few nice boy band numbers. madonna was calling to me, but i resisted.


SO THAT WAS MUNICH.

NOW I'M IN GENEVA. KEEP READING BECAUSE IT'S FUN TO READ!!


sunday i got up SO HEARLY and caught the 7:12 train to zurich, and connected to geneva. geneva is not nearly as pretty as i imagined. its actually quite dirty and scungey. my hostel is fine, but after munich its hard because its just not social at all. theres no bar, there are lots of families despite being called 'geneva youth hostel' and its in a really boring area with no shops. there are some shops actually, but theyre mostly brothels. which is weird. i wandered along the river instead with a brazillian guy and a guy from zurich who i met in the hostel, and the brazillian guy jumped off a 5 metre platform which was pretty cool. i was too scared. and he was too sleazy so i wanted to leave.

its also really really really french, which i wasnt expecting. i was hoping there would be some german or italian, with which im much more comfortable, but its alllll french.

today, monday, i went to the UNITED NATIONS. it was ok. me and an american guy i met at breakfast, called brian, took a guided tour, but they really dont let you see much. its a real bus in bus out mentality. the general public are not allowed in the grounds, or to observe any conferences, but i got to see some cool rooms. i also bought a UN lanyard so that made the whole thing worth it.

the red cross museum is next to the UN, so i had a look around there, but its pretty lame. so i came back to the hostel and had a long long nap because i was bored and tired and lame. this afternoon i took a walk across the river to the old town, intending to get dinner, and this was the sight of DISASTER NUMBER TWO.

DISASTER NUMBER TWO:

so, i spend about a billion hours walking around and around and around and around stupid french geneva looking for somewhere i could eat for under 50 bucks. eventually i find a packed looking restaurant (good sign), and sit down. i look at the menu for a long time. i decide on tuna carpaccio with coconut cream and lime. the cleverer among you can see where this is going. I DONT KNOW WHY BUT I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE A FILLET. yeah, it wasnt. it arrived, in all its raw pink fishy glory. i looked out at the river. a single tear rolled down my cheek (not really. the medication wouldnt allow it!) and i asked for some bread. so basically i paid 30 dollars for 5 pieces of very stale bread, about 6 pieces of lettuce and a tablespoon of coconut cream. :( i thought about forcing it down, but i thought, why punish myself twice, i have to give away 30 dollars, why should i also eat raw fish?

i would like to assure you that the above disaster is entirely the fault of lame geneva, and i was merely the innocent victim.

following 'dinner' i craved the comfort of sleep but i wandered along the river a bit. there was some kind of lame carnival happening where a white man dressed as a ninja was cutting up fruit with a samurai sword using a live chinaman as a chopping board. i watched that for a bit. then i sat on the river with my new book (lady chatterly's lover) and read for about an hour as the sun went down.

its monday night now, and im in geneva until i catch a train to vienna at about 6 on wednesday morning. my phone has no credit so i cant receive calls, but im still receiving your msgs of love (though i guess some of them are getting lost!) so keep messaging and EMAILING PLS. it makes for the highlight of my day.

not sure where after vienna. suggestions?

miss, love.
xo