londonland

lessons on life from londonland - jesstyle


1. melbourne is not a big city. london is a big city.

2. microfiber towels are an evil perversion of all that is good and right about bathing.

3. if your housemates/travel buddies have tinea, you have tinea. there are no two ways about it.

4. there is an inhuman amount of tax on alcohol in australia.

5. london water is filtered from the thames, which means there is a lot but it tastes like shit and hurts your hair and skin.

6. conditioner makes a better replacement for shaving cream than soap.

7. london has more cctv surveillance than you can ever imagine. you are caught on camera on average 300 times a day.

8. topshop is the bomb.


so there you have it. it's been a fucking blast of a week, so far tuesday 11am and i've only been here since thursday but it's been huge. we've done all your classic touristy stuff, including being incredibly stingey until we get overwhelmed by the delicious food and break the budget.

i won't bore you with the touristy things we've done, but i will bore you with the amazing menu on offer. whoever told me that london food sucked is a twat.

firstly, sandwiches. london has a fucking amazing sandwich culture. there's this shop called pret-a-manger, which i think means ready to eat, which we don't have in aus but the rest of the world is their bitch and so they should be. avocado and falafel wraps with pine nuts and relish and cress for 2 pounds 50, or about 5 bucks, plus a drink and a pudding called banoffie pie. fuck man. melbourne food sucks. then there's these huge vegetarian orgasms called grain shop where you get 5 scoops of anything from chickpea curry to creamy pasta to anything, just fuckin A. and a pint for less than 3 pounds of becks and you're laughing.

tescos. everything is made for singles! as in, single portions. singledom is not punished here. single serves of soups and tortellini with feta and olive fillings, bagels with smears of cream cheese and avocado and mayonnaise... my god.

topshop!! for us who only ever knew of topshop from mighty boosh (ie. topshop! tap tap), i was never prepared. it's david jones prices but it's boutique quality individual fashion. just a fucking mind blowing department store.

markets. fresh fruit, a pound for bags of avocadoes and tomatoes, fresh pastries, fresh chocolate biscuits with still melting chocolate, retro clothes, jewellery, crowds :S but still mind blowing.

the tube!! it's so quick and reliable!!

house parties in wimbledon where you can stay in your pjs.

art galleries, modern and traditional (?). seeing van gogh and monet and dali and bunuel with your own eyes. whole exhibitions devoted to surrealism and experimentalism and poetry and the dream.

and a quick run down for my own recollection later:
thursday - arrive, pumpkin curry, sleep.

friday - piccadilly adventures, trafalgar square, national gallery with dan korsak who was mostly excited by cupid's modern day pimp similarities, finding anthony on the street like a hobo, an hour train trip to reading which is a uni town to see simon amstell (yum!!)

saturday - portobello markets with anthony, grain shop, closed tube, double decker bus, nap, party!!, irish man singing songs from the frames and making dan and me feel warm in tummy (until later)

sunday - hangover but not for me, wes wondering where his polish lady had escaped to, covent garden markets and cookies, dan's friends from interplay in st james park, buckingham palace!! home where bethy made delicious stir fry and watched enchanted

monday - tate modern, poetry and the dream exhibition and the awesome modern art timeline which i wanted to copy for future reference, lunch at eat! which is another awesome sandwich shop, walking over the thames, shopping on oxford st with money we don't have (topshop, urban outfitters, h&m, primark), tegan and sara and lots of lesbians, the bus, sleep.

tuesday - today! happy birthday dad.


thanks if you read that far!! apologies if i haven't been emailing, internet is expensive and my mind boggles, but please comment and tell me about your lives because i read all of my emails even if i can't reply.


love to my melbourne homies xoxoxoxoxoxox